human garbage disposal

Ok, so when I was growing up, like 8 or 9, Human Garbage Disposal was my nickname around the house. I could eat. I mean, how many girls would have a taco eating contest with their dad? I remember going to Taco Bell, usually after we had been at the beach all day, and we got one of those family meals, with a lot of extra tacos. My 2 little brothers could eat, and my dad, without a question could eat, and I was up for the challenge as well. (I know that this is hard to imagine, even Leslee would get her taco on, those of you who know her will find this amusing). I think I ate 5 once. Gross.
Fast forward to today, years later I have hungup the nick name (thank god). Now that Im eating for TWO, I have a reason to eat,its a neccisity, you would think this was my big chance to eat 5 tacos guilt free! But no, there is no guilt free eating at taco bell. I had the hankering for the bell a few weeks ago, and I had it TWICE in a 24 hour period. Let me tell you, I thought I was going to die. I mean seriously, I had the worst gas pains I think that anyone has ever had on the face of this earth. I needed to fart, and I couldnt, it was trapped, and i think there was 7 pounds of compounded gas in my stomach. I was on the floor of the bathroom, at 2 am, for almost 20 minutes, almost in tears! I never prayed for a fart before, and theres always a first, right? Well, there was no release, but i finally went and got back in bed, and fell asleep. The next day, at work, it hit me again, BAM combined with the fire from hell in my chest. Great, now my chest was on fire, and I was gassy still. How could something I loved so much cause so much pain? I was heartbroken to relieze it was my run for the border that caused me all the agony. Tons of Tums later, I was feeling better, although scarred for life.
There will be no more Taco Bell for this little bean in my belly, I shudder everytime I drive by one. So please, if you are with me, and hungry, dont ask me if I want Taco Bell.
The answer is NO.